Emotional Fluctuation
by Hallie cullen
Summary: I didn't know when it changed, my feelings for Edward. I really didn't know when it changed, maybe because I wasn't expecting it to. I mean, my emotions towards him have fluctuated so many times that I was convinced that the hatred I felt for him was the last emotion I'd ever feel for him. Please read and review.
1. Preparation and Reminiscing

I didn't know when it changed, my feelings for Edward. I really didn't know when it changed, maybe because I wasn't expecting it to. I mean, my emotions towards him have fluctuated so many times that I was convinced that the hatred I felt for him was the last emotion I'd ever feel for him.  
Now, I know very well that many people will think 'hatred is too strong an emotion to feel towards someone' but if you know Edward like I do then even you too would feel hatred for him. So why is my emotion towards him changing, you ask, why am I rambling about someone I supposedly hate at 2 o'clock in the morning? Well, that said someone has done the unthinkable. He has made me care about him.

 **Year 1**

I could still hear Renee's rambles even though I'd tuned her out. That woman just doesn't know when to shut up or stop talking. I mean, I know I ramble like she does but the difference between the both of us is that I tend to keep my rambling inside my head and not out where it can disturb people's peace.  
"Bella, I know you think you know it all but trust me I know this, you will forget something extremely important and you will call me and make drive all the way down to your university just to give it to you, which is why I keep telling you to check again that you have everything. I mean I know we made a list but can you think of anything we may have missed?" on and on she keeps yapping.  
Don't get me wrong I love her – it may not seem like I do, but I adore her. But if I were to choose between her and daddy then I'm definitely choosing Charlie. Charlie is my dad and unlike my mother he doesn't talk too much; I guess opposites do attract.  
"Bell, it's extremely rude to be daydreaming when your own mother is talking to you," she berated and I rolled my eyes. I forgot how dramatic she can also be.  
"I'm not daydreaming, mother," I retorted, "and we've been over the list so many times that I've got the list ingrained in my brain: bed sheets, pillows, food, tampons, pots..."  
"No need to mock me, Bella, I'm just looking out for you because if I don't then who will? I'm you mother and its my job to make sure that you have all that you may need."  
… and there is the guilt. The Oscar performance of the year goes to Renee Swan for her dazzling performance, and the crowd cheers and fresh bouquets of flowers are presented to her.

Snickering silently, I respond like the loving daughter that I am, "I'm sorry, Mum, I'm just stressed about all the new friends I'll have to make." There. That should make her happy.  
"Oh, why are you scared? Isn't Alice coming to the same university as you? I thought you told me that all the Cullens are going to the university, I mean that's one of the only reasons your father and I agreed that you could go to that university even though you'll be way too far away from us."  
All in one breath, damn Renee; thou art truly a woman of extreme talent.  
"Yes, they are, but I'm trying to expand my circle and move away from being friends with just Alice, you know," I replied. Some part of me is scared that Alice will ditch me for someone else, so I have to be prepared. I mean, let's face it – she's way cooler than me. Alice has been my friend for some time now – we meet in secondary school, year 9 to be precise. I was the new kid because my family moved around a lot back then and we had moved to a new area again which meant I had to change school. To be perfectly honest I wasn't too worried about changing schools. My biggest fear was that my mum would be one of the teachers at my school and I was fervently praying to God, and even baby Jesus, that she wouldn't get a job there.

I remember my first day at Trinity Church of England Secondary School. I was super nervous because I was this short black girl and I know almost all the people in my year group started secondary school from year 7 together, so some part of me was really prepared to be an outcast among the students. I mean, the fact that the school was a Church of England school was mainly what my parents were thinking about. Even though they would have preferred a catholic school, they really do not mind Church of England. All the details about my first day had already been sent to me via letter a few days before starting school, so I knew which house and tutor group I would be in before getting there.

I remember I got to school really early and a teacher showed me to the class where my tutor group was and she left me there outside the door, waiting for my tutor group teacher to get there and open the door. When the teacher got there, she passed me my timetable and introduced me to the class. She instructed a student to take me to my lesson and around the school for the whole day. However, after my first lesson, the student left me instead of taking to my next lesson.

That led to me getting lost and getting to my second lesson of the day late and I barged my way into the class which forced the teacher to stop talking and all eyes turned to me – talk about a mortifying moment. To make matters worse, all the tables were filled up and I could see it in all their face,s telling me that I'm definitely not sitting with them... and that was how I met Alice. I remember I was very close to tears then I saw this girl with curly brown hair waving me forward to come to her table. She was like a life saver. When I got to the table she introduced me to her other friends: Angela, Lucy and Jessica.

That was the start secondary school and my friendship with Alice Cullen. Unknown to me was that said friendship would last for years to come, and we would go through hell and back.


	2. The Shirt

**Disclaimer: Twilight does not belong to me, unfortunately it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer and I'm only borrowing her characters. Huge thanks to my Beta Has a rubber soul for her patience and for correcting all my nonsensical grammars (trust me she's a star). Also thank you all for adding the story to your favourite list and for following it, you made me so happy!.**

"Bella, please tell me you're still at home. Can you believe Edward forgot the green shirt I bought for him? And I specifically told him that I want him to wear that to the fresher's barbeque that the flat will be hosting."  
These are the times that I question my friendship with Alice and I evaluate why I actually love her.

"Alice... take a deep breath," I say, "I'm sure that your brother has more than one shirt that he can wear and what do you want me to do about it? You left already and I'm in the car waiting for my mum to get her butt in here and drive."  
I know what she wants, but I don't know why I think not saying it will make her not say it.

Alice and I had a plan – actually, Alice made the plan and I just went along with it for my peace of mind. Her plan was that she would leave an hour earlier than me because, and I'm quoting, 'I want to start decorating my room before you get there so I can decorate your own room with you.' What she didn't plan for was the fact that her twin brother may not agree with her plan because he wants to have a good rest.

"Bella, you have one of the spare keys to my house and all you have to do is go in and go to Edward's room and grab the shirt and bring it with you... Edward she is not going to snoop through your room... you won't do that, right Bella?"  
I could hear Edward's voice in the background protesting. Don't worry, asshat, I'm with you on this one. I don't want all the STDs and germs stored in your room to jump at me.

"Bella I brought some cupcakes that you can take with you and give to your flat mates to break the ice, who doesn't love cupcakes, right?" Mum is back.  
"Thanks, Mum. Can we please get on the road now? And Alice, I agree with Edward, there is no need for me to be in his room – and make sure he knows that even if he pays me I won't touch his shi- stuff."  
Thou shall not swear anywhere near Renee's arm length or thou shall get a swift decking.

"Bella please, I really want him to wear that shirt," whiny Alice is out to play.  
"What does Alice want?" Mum asks. Between Renee and Alice I often wonder at times how I'm still sane or if was ever sane to begin with.  
"She wants us to get Edward one of his shirts that she wants him to wear to the Flat Barbeque," I explain.

"Oh, I'm sure we can stop over at their house and get it for her. I mean, it's not that far and it's actually on our way to your University. It's no problem, Alice, we'll get the shirt for you."  
Of course she will. She adores Alice just like everyone else.  
"Thank you so much Mrs Swan," Alice replies, "See, Bella, I told you it wouldn't take long."

"Alice, I'm not gonna step a foot into Edward's room and that's final."  
I'm so glad I can't see her face right now because I know she will be pouting. That's how she gets what she wants.  
"Bellsy, please, I'll let you decorate your room the way you want," she pleads and I know that now she must be really desperate.  
"Umm, you drive a hard bargain. Okay, I'll do it, but ask him where it is exactly because I do not want to spend more time than necessary in his room."

"He said it's in his closet, it's hanging up I think."

I've only ever been into Edward's room twice; once when his mum sent me there to get him to come downstairs for dinner and he wouldn't answer the door (turned out he was bathing so there was no one in the room). The second time was last year when Alice had a party at their house and I was so tired that I must have mistakably walked into his room thinking it was Alice's room… yeah, from what I saw him doing in there, that's never going to happen again.  
"Bye, see you in a bit."

Edward and I have always clashed heads. I mean he did bully me for some time and at the time I was just this little girl that was mesmerized by his good looks, even though back then he was ugly compared to what he looks like now. What I had for him was never really a crush, it was more a deep thoughtful questioning on why God will waste all those good genes and beautiful looks on someone as vain and selfish as Edward, or Jerkward as I like to call him.

I first met him in secondary school just like I met his twin sister. I remember that day when he walked into the cafeteria. Like most girls in there I was flabbergasted that a guy could look that good at his age. However, that all went straight to the bin when he opened his big mouth and asked, "What is she doing here?"

"Oh, hello to you too," Alice had answered, "Edward, meet Bella and Bella, meet Edward. He's my twin brother and yeah I know we don't look very much alike."  
Alice, ever the oblivious pixie, didn't notice the distaste in his voice when he spat the question.  
"I know who she is. She's the new girl that barged her way into French class; everyone is talking about it. What I don't know is what she's doing at OUR table." First of all, I didn't barge my way in, who's saying all this crap about me? And secondly, I guess bad news does travel fast.

"She's my new friend so she's sitting with us." God bless you Alice.  
"Hello Edward."  
I had to show him that he can't talk about me like I don't exist, not when I'm sitting there.  
"Yeah, sure."  
He didn't even reply to me.  
Let's just say from then onwards he has made it his mission to piss me off and I've made it my mission to resist the urge to strangle him. I guess he really started bullying me when he realized that Alice was very serious about us being friends after moving me up to the position of best friend after two weeks of knowing her. Before that he mainly just ignored me and acted like I didn't exist.

Bella, all you have to do is go in there, grab the shirt and come back out, it's really not that hard. Yeah, his room is probably distasteful but I'm sure you can't catch anything dangerous within two seconds of being in there. Yeah, that stupid pep talk did nothing to increase my willingness to enter his room.  
"Here we are, Bell," a giddy Renee pointed out.  
Of course she's happy, she's making her favourite daughter Alice happy by doing this. Okay here goes nothing. I mean, it's not like Edward will be in his room having sex with some random girl again, right? He's far away at uni decorating his new room – he probably packed everything out of his room. I search through my keys before selecting the familiar key out of them all and thrust it into the keyhole. I'm praying that I don't hear the click that signifies that the door is unlocked but alas, like always, the world is against me as I heard the dreaded CLICK!

The welcome mat has never been so uninviting. I hear a purr by my feet and I can feel their blue-eyed Himalayan cat purring away at me.  
"Hello, Doctor Moon, are you missing the fam?"  
Don't ask me why the family cat's name is Doctor Moon. All I know is Alice was truly going through some things when she named the poor cat Doctor Moon. She said she had to put Doctor because their dad is a doctor – I told you the girl is crazy. The family is just grateful she didn't change her name to STARGARYEN after discovering her love for Game of Thrones, although I argued it would have been a cooler name. I mean, who doesn't ship Daenerys and Jon Snow, please?

After petting Moon for a little bit I drop him back down because I need to get going, but not before I put some food in the bowl for her. I have a quick look around the room before going up the stairs. I've always loved the Cullen's house. I move up the stairs as slow as possible, like it will take away the fact that I will still enter my nemesis's lair. Climbing the last stairs, I walk past Alice's room and keep walking until I get to the last room and read the sign on the door saying "Edward's room". I take a deep breath…

Here goes nothing.

 **What do you guys think of Doctor Moon? do you want me to Change it to Stargaryen? Yes i loveeeee Game of thrones (impatiently waiting for season 7) and a link to the picture of the cat will be in my bio, so go check it out!**

 **Thank you all so much again for reading the first chapter and for all the love. Once again i want to thank my beautiful Beta Has a rubber soul, you're all enjoying this story because of all her grammatical correction.**

 **See you all next chapter and don't forget to Review and follow the story. muah!**


	3. Author's Note

Hi everyone, this is not an update.

I am so sorry that chapter 3 was not posted last week (Sunday is the first day of the week not Monday), I was really busy and I was also a little bit lazy. However, the chapter is done and it's with my Beta (Has a rubber soul) who is a star so you should be getting the chapter soon. Please don't forget to add the story to your Follow list and also favourite it and review, so you can get an email whenever I update the story. Thank you for your patience and support and also for your reviews, they mean the world to me.

Also, I have decided that I will be updating once a week and if you're lucky maybe twice some weeks.

Check out my profile, I recommended some Authors for you to check out. Their stories are amazing and they inspired me to start writing again. Also while you're there, you should follow me because I am currently writing a One-shot and if you follow me you'll get a notification about it.

Another thing, if anyone is interested in making a banner for the story please let me know. I am very happy to let you do that.

 **Muah!**


	4. Pissy day!

**Disclaimer: Twilight does not belong to me, unfortunately it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer and I'm only borrowing her characters. Huge thanks to my Beta Has a rubber soul for her patient and for correcting all my nonsensical grammars (trust me she's a star). Also thank you all for adding the story to your favourite list and for following it, you made me so happy!.**

Upon waking up this morning there was one thing I knew about my feelings towards Edward, and that was hatred. Yes, that deep intense dislike towards someone, and that someone is Edward fucking Cullen. However, as I stand here in his room I question whether the hatred I felt for him this morning is the right word to describe what I feel. There are words such as loathe, repugnance, antipathy, and many more. Why these new intense feelings towards him, I hear you ask. Well I'll have to take you back a few minutes ago.

Few minutes ago.

After petting Moon for a little bit I dropped him back down because I needed to get going, but not before I put some food in the bowl for her. I did a quick look around the room before going up the stairs. I've always loved the Cullen's house. I moved up the stairs as slow as possible, like it will take away the fact that I will still enter my nemesis's lair. Climbing the last few stairs I walked past Alice's room and kept walking until I got to the last room and read the sign on the door: 'Edward's room'. I took a deep breath.

Here goes nothing.

However, I was dead wrong. What was behind that door was more than nothing; in fact, what was behind that door was another way of Edward letting me know that he hates me just as much as I hate him.

I finally turned the handle and opened his bedroom door. The first thing I heard was a tick-tock and for a few seconds I wondered what it could possibly be. However, I didn't have to think for too long because seconds later I realised that it was a trap. Yep, you heard right. The whole 'I left my shirt at home' ploy was a trap, a trap that I fell for, which is why I'm standing in Edward's room splattered in cold water.

You see, Edward "Asshole" Cullen, has connected some entrapment and left a little bowl of water on his bed that has splashed all over me. I now have a wet patch on my blouse. Did I mention that I literally loathe Edward Cullen? I move closer to the bowl that's on the floor, contemplating whether Esme needed to know about this or if I should just keep it to myself and use it as ammunition another day. I decide that I might as well just grab the damn shirt that brought me to this fricking room in the first place. Now, imagine my surprise when I got to the closet and there was an envelope on the floor with 'Bella (if this is Esme, I'm really sorry about the water but please do not open this)' written on it. Obviously my curiosity got the best of me and I opened it:

 **I guess since you're reading this my plan must have worked (I truly hope this is not Esme). Well if it's you Bella, this is for last month when you told Tanya that I have gonorrhoea because I kept coughing. I heard you even did her a favour by researching about it and told her about ways to protect herself. One of the ways was to make sure she doesn't have sex with me because if she does 'she will die'. Did you really think it was water that I left in that bowl? Nah, it was piss – have fun getting to school with that stink on you! And, oh, by the way, I took my green shirt with me. And remember if you tell Esme or Renee about this then she will know that when you told her you were going to the cinema with Alice last month you actually went with Jacob and I saw all the kissing and fooling around you both did in that back seat. Poor Alice, Esme will also know that Jasper and her do more than kissing and every time she said she's 'sleeping over at yours' its actually Jasper that she's entertaining.**

I was frozen for a few seconds, not thinking or moving, just frozen. Edward Cullen has outdone himself this time. His piss. Wow. I was still thunderstruck when I closed the closet door and walked out of his room and down the stairs and out the door, turning around briskly to lock it.

"So, where is the green shirt you were meant to get for Edward?" my mother asked as I got into the car.  
And just like that, all my senses came back to me and I snapped out of the shock that I was in.  
"Umm... it wasn't there. I'll call Alice to tell him to check his stuff properly, he probably packed it before leaving and he just didn't notice it."  
I cannot believe I fell for it. He planned it quite perfectly. All the pretence that he didn't want me in his room made me not suspect him. After all, I have been waiting for his revenge since Tanya told him what I said, but to be honest I just suggested to her what I think may be wrong and what I would do.

"What happened to your top, Bells?"  
Of course she will ask, how can I think she wouldn't notice? How will I explain that the devil's spawn that is my best friend's brother left his piss for me on his bed and now I stink?  
"Nothing mum, I splashed some water on me when I got some for Doctor Moon," I lied. I hope she believes that, because I'm not in the mood to explain anything, not when I have some revenge to plan.

I turned around looking for my jacket that I left before going inside, however I couldn't find it anywhere. I then remembered that I left in on my seat, which must mean that I'm sitting on it. After pulling it out, I turned towards the window and put my headphones on, tuning out the radio and Renee. I turned my music up and listened to Stormzy's angry voice because that's the only thing that can calm my anger down.

I must have fallen asleep because next thing I know Renee was shaking me and telling me to wake up.  
"Uunnmmm... stop that, stop shaking me," I grumble.  
Renee looks blurry which made me rub my eyes.  
"We are almost there Bella. You slept for two hours straight, are you that tired honey?"  
Wow, I must be more exhausted than I actually thought.  
"I think you forgot to call Alice before, that's why I woke you up so can call her and let her know we are almost there," said Renee.

I was just about to grab my phone to call Alice when my mum turned around and said, "Umm, Bell, can you smell wee or is it my nose?"  
I will kill Edward Cullen. Obviously I had to quickly distract her.  
"No, I can't, but now that you mention it I am really busting to go to the toilet. How much longer before we get there?"

"According to the navigator, we should be there in about 30 minutes, but you know I don't trust this things so I'll say about 45 minutes. Do you have your printed schedule for the day, like where you're going tp pick up your keys, your room number and where it will be?"

"Yes, mum, like I told you yesterday, I printed it out already."  
Going to my most recent calls I dial Alice's number and after several ring she picks up.

"Oh my god, Bells, are you here? Are you outside? Do you want me to send Edward to come help you? He's finished unpacking most of his stuff and he's been pestering me, asking whether you've called me or not. Yeah, why didn't you call me to let me that you've got the shirt? Please don't tell me that you guys literally just left because I specifically told you to leave two hours and 15 minutes ago."  
All in one breath, how does she do it?

"Take a deep breath, Alice, we are almost there and your brother's shirt was not in his closet so no, I don't have it, but I'm sure he does. By the way, tell him that he's dead when I see him cause he made me go all the way to your house knowing it's not there."  
I can see Renee in the corner of my eye giving me the stink eye and shaking her head.

"Oh, stop being dramatic Bella, I'm sure he didn't intentionally send you there, he genuinely thought he forgot it."  
Oh Alice, how can I explain to you what your brother did to me?

"Alice, I don't want to talk about your brother. I called you to let you know that we will be there in about 20 minutes, and also to remind you that you promised to let me decorate my room the way I want to. I mean it, Alice! You can be there when I'm decorating and arranging my room, however I'm going to do it my own way not the Alice Cullen way."  
Yes, I sound like a bitch but if you know Alice then you will understand that she's not beneath using bribery, pouting and blackmailing to get her way and I am tired of the Cullens getting one on me today. Yes, maybe I am being mean to Alice because of what Edward did.

"But...Bella, please. I'll just like to tell you what looks good and what doesn't."

"Alice that's what I want and to be frankly honest I don't feel like I should be begging you for my right to do my things the way I want to do it. See you soon, we should be there in around 15 minutes."  
Poor Renee looks so uncomfortable. I guess she has never seen me stand my ground against Alice before.

Turning away to take my previous position of looking outside, I noticed that Renee wanted to say something but I guess she's still debating whether to say it or not. Maybe she's worried I'll bite her head off as well. My inner bitch is now here to play as well.  
"Out with it, mum."  
I might as well let her know that the fact the she keeps looking at me and looking away is starting to piss me off. Isn't it ironic? I've got piss on me and I'm being pissed off, what a pissy day!

"Seriously Bell, I smell wee. Really, I'm not trying to wind you up but I actually smell something," said Renee, very seriously.  
I burst out laughing like a crazy woman because I know that wasn't what she wanted to say but she wants me to calm down before telling me the truth.  
"Anyways, if you're done laughing at your mum, do you want to tell me why you were so angry with Alice? I mean I've never seen you like that with her. I hope everything is okay with the both of you."

"Yeah, we are fine, and I'm not angry with her. I'm just tired and cranky that we are not there yet. Don't worry yourself, sometimes Alice just needs to be told no just to make sure she knows that she's not the boss."  
She doesn't look like she believes me but I guess she doesn't want to question me any further because she nods her head and turns the radio volume a bit louder.

A few minutes later we drive past the sign saying WELCOME TO PINEWOOD UNIVERISTY.

Taking out my phone, I text Alice: just got past the sign board.

I look around, thinking to myself that this is where I'm going to be spending the next three years of my life. What's the worst that could happen? I had no idea then that by the time my three years are over, nothing will be the same. I would have grown and experienced loss and love.

 **Thank you so much for reading, I know I didn't update last week I am truly sorry. Please read and Review.** **Also, let me know how your Christmas preparation is going in your review (we still haven't even buy the tree. LOL). see you all next chapter.**

 **Muah!**


	5. New beginning and Reassurance

**Disclaimer: Twilight does not belong to me, unfortunately it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer and I'm only borrowing her characters. Huge thanks to my Beta Has a rubber soul for her patient and for correcting all my nonsensical grammars (trust me she's a star). Also thank you all for adding the story to your favourite list and for following it, you made me so happy!**

Opening the car door, I looked around my surroundings. I take it all in, then I smile because this is the beginning of my new life. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I didn't have my freedom before but here I am finally alone. I have bills I suddenly have to pay and not rely on my parents to pay for me so, yes, for me this is the beginning.

Suddenly, I feel a sense of guilt wash over me. I looked at my mother and I saw her glance around as well; then she suddenly looked down and started fussing with her bag. Anyone who knows Renee knows that she doesn't fuss, she carries herself with grace and does not show any weakness and fussing is a sign of weakness. When she looked back up at me I saw the tears in her eyes and I knew that while I was happy to leave she was sad to see me go.  
"Your father said that he is almost here and that he's sorry he couldn't make the journey with us," she said, rubbing her eyes and trying to pretend that what I saw in there was not real. "Where are Alice and her brother? They need to get out here so we can start moving all this stuff. Bella, did you say that you have your room number already? But doesn't that mean you have to go get your room key so we can open the door?"  
Now she's rambling. This is the mother that has been there for me all my life. She birthed me and breathed life into me, yet I am so happy to leave her. I walk towards her and hugged her – that was when the strongest woman I knew broke down and started crying. The same woman that held her ground when the principal of my secondary school told her they didn't think it was advisable for me to study science. She held her ground and told him that if that's what I want to pick then that's what I should pick.

The same woman that when my dad started coming home late at night, packed my bag and her bag and moved us to my auntie's house and told him that unless he starts making more time for his family then he is definitely prepared to lose us; and the same woman that made a plan to become the principal of her secondary school and two years after teaching there executed that plan.

I rub her back as she cries just like she used to when I was younger, and I don't know how long we were there for – me just holding her while she cries. A car horn jolts us out of our embrace and forces us into the real world. Looking at the cause of the intrusion suddenly brought tears to my eyes – it was my father. Growing up, there was one title that I have always accepted and used to describe myself countless times, and that was Daddy's Girl. My father is my life and the love of my life, the first man that I ever fell in love with. He was the first man to ever show me how princesses should be treated and showered me with affection. As he got out of his car I couldn't keep my tears in anymore. I ran straight for him and jumped on him the way I used to when I was small and he came back home from work and he held me tight just like he used to.

We were there for a few minutes until I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket and my dad said, "Don't you think you should check that, kiddo? I kind of need to breathe, you're way too strong for your old man."  
Of course he must crack jokes. I took out my phone to check who was calling me: Alice.

"Bella, you told me you've gone past the sign board over 15 minutes ago and yet you haven't called to let me know that you're outside," she rapidly fires at me, "Is everything okay?"  
"You can calm down, we are downstairs and my dad just joined us, mum and I were hugging him," I reply – she doesn't need to know that I was the only one actually doing all the hugging. "Can you please come down now with the assh- I mean your brother?"  
A little slip.

Immediately Alice came down, and we both went to the student centre to get my key card and we were also given printed copies of rules and guidelines that we must abide by while living in halls. It was on our way back that Alice finally got the courage to ask me what I know has been on her mind since. "Umm... Bella, I honestly hope that you're not mad at me, I really didn't mean to keep pushing your button."  
If I know Alice as well as I do, I know she's definitely not done so I wait for her to gather her thoughts and tell me what she's cooking up.

"If I'm honest with you, I didn't really think you'd get that angry or react the way you did. I was just joking with you and you totally flipped up at me," she said, rolling and twisting the hair at the nape of her head.  
"First of all, I am sorry that I shouted at you, but you and I both know you weren't joking. Alice, you know I love you and you know if I weren't as deeply into men I'd totally do you," I say, which makes us laugh out loud and she nods her head, maybe due to the countless time we've joked about it,  
"...loving you also means knowing you and, babe, sometimes I actually feel like you don't know me."  
I know I should tell her why I'm actually angry, but no matter how much I hate Fuckward the relationship between him and his sister is very special to me and I really don't want it destroyed. So yeah, I'd rather lie to her and make her think it's something else than have her get angry with her brother. Anyway, this is between Edward and me – we have an unspoken rule that we do not involve Alice in any of out paybacks, nor would we jeopardise our relationship with her.

"Oh my god, Bells, do you really feel that way about our friendship? How come you've never said anything? Babe you know I love you so much, like a sister I never had, I don't want you to feel or think you're less than that."  
I looked down sadly whilst kicking some rocks to thicken her guilt so that she will forget what started this conversation to begin with.  
"Bells, I am truly sorry if I've ever made you feel any less than that. I know I'm hard to get along with because I have an affinity to be in control of everything and everyone but I assure you it's from a place of love," she continued. I stopped the unintentional forward and backward swing of my leg when I felt a hand on my shoulder. Then, without warning, Alice's small body collided with mine and so did the guilt of manipulating my best friend.

We stood in our embrace for a few seconds and then, like everyone today, she too pointed out the fact that I stunk, and that just made me suddenly want to have a hot bath.  
"Umm, Alice," I started, but she suddenly covered my mouth with her hand and told me to shush for a few seconds.

"Alice I love you and all but this is starting to feel a teensy bit weird, and I really need a bath because I feel tired. Your big hair is also all over my face and while I always tell you that it smells nice I'm just not too sure I want some in my mouth."  
I used my hand to push her away a bit to get my point across. Once her head was no longer resting on my shoulder I turned towards her and I finally noticed that I had actually hurt her way more that I thought.

"Alice, remember that time when we were in year 10 and I had that burst of anger when everyone refused to shut up in class? Well, I think that's what happened today. First of all, I'm sorry that I screamed at you and cut off the phone, that was rude but I'm glad that you realise that it's not good for you to keep controlling everyone around you."  
The love I felt for her suddenly overwhelmed me to the point that I pulled her towards me and hugged her again. Sometimes I do wonder why I truly love her. No matter what her Dumbo of a brother may do to me I still love her and never once considered not being her friend, because that would break my heart.

When we finally got back to my accommodation, I noticed that my dad and mum were not outside in the parking lot anymore and my stuff was not in the car. Alice said that Edward probably took everything to my floor and that my parents were probably waiting in the kitchen for us. As we began our ascent up the stairs, I began to prepare myself for the encounter I'm about to have with the devil, and appeal to God to grant me strength to not lash out in anger or sucker punch Edward. Amen.

 **...And that's it everyone. Please don't forget to Review and share the story.**

 **Sorry that I haven't updated the story in weeks but RL can be unpredictable some times. As always a big Thank you to Has a Rubber soul for being the amazing star that she truly is, without you all this poor soul will probably be crying from my grammatical error.**

 **Happy new year to you all, a new year is a time to start afresh, to set your mind afresh and look at life with a different perspective. I truly hope you all make good use of it, I'm definitely trying to. The link to my social media is on my profile so lets be friends!**


	6. New Friendships

**DISCLAIMER: SM owns everything except Emmett's bulging muscles (they belong to me!).**

 **New Friendships**

At times I question the different nicknames I have for Edward, wondering whether I'm just too dramatic or something. However, the smile that graced his artistically carved face when I entered the kitchen makes me realise that maybe he's not the devil's spawn, after all, maybe he, himself, is the fricking devil.

From the door, I could hear my parents talking, and I could also hear a couple of other voices, so I turned to Alice. Because I'm psychically linking to her, she is able to decipher what I said with my eyes and mind. 'OMG, I was so worried that you were angry with me I totally forgot to tell you that our other flatmates are here and those are the voices you hear. Don't worry, they are super cool, and Jasper belongs to me by the way, I called dibs on him immediately."

Pushing the door open, the first thing my eyes caught was the unmistakable victory smile on Edward's face. And even though I could not see it then, there was a victorious gleam in his eye that showed his satisfaction and thrill about the cat and mouse game we seem to play with each other.

And just like that, i started my journey in a new place with new and old friends, and like all of you reading this will eventually do, I flip to a new chapter in my story.

My first night in the flat was eventful, to say the least. I was super angry at Edward. However, I couldn't hash it out him the way I wanted to since we were in the company of others. And also because i didn't want our new roommates to all think that I'm crazy. If anything, i want them to see Edward as the crazy psychopath that i see him as that everyone else can't seem to no one else does.

Therefore, because of that I decided that I will suppress my anger and leave my confrontation until after dinner...and like all badly laid plans, I crashed and burned. It was all going fine at first, immediately getting into the flat I said hello to everyone and went straight to the bathroom to have a shower, lying to everyone that I was just super tired and need to wash the sleep off me so they won't question my behaviour. However, I saw Edward's smug face and I knew without a doubt that he was laughing in his monster sized head. Laugh at my pain!

Asshole!

After my shower, i properly introduced myself to our new roomies, and i couldn't have been much happier with the group of people we were assigned. Rosalie and Jasper are twins; however, apart from the blonde locks and piercing, ocean blue eyes, there is nothing the same about them. Rosalie- or Rose- has the whole model look going on. Long legs, full blonde hair trimmed and styled to perfection, boobs bigger than my head, and non-existent waist that leads to a curvaceous and bootylicious booty. Yes, Rose is the kind of girl that all guys want and all girls want to be, but hate them at the same damn time.

Her brother Jasper, however, has the whole cowboy look going for him, and he topped it with a southern accent. His blond hair falls shaggy behind him, and even though he is not very muscular, you can tell that he either does heavy lifting or goes to the gym once in a while. After I was introduced to the twins, i was then introduced to Emmett, the monster man. My first reaction to him was to run out of the room and hide under the covers. While Jasper looks like he doesn't work out Emmett, on the other hand, looks like he has a bed at the gym and he eats and breaths gym. He has muscles bulging out everywhere, even his t-shirt looks like it's begging for mercy … to be released from the tight grip his chest has on it. So imagine my surprise when he smiles, and all I see are dimples, and I am unable to control the warmth that spreads through my chest. All of a sudden, I imagine that he would give the warmest, bone-crushing hugs that wraps all around your insides and comforts you.

Let me just say that I was right, because unlike Jasper and Rose who smiled at me, Emmett picked me up and hugged me so hard that I had to tap his shoulder the way a KungFu fighter being crushed by another KungFu fighter taps the floor for mercy. I could see my father's big smile when Emmett released me because now he can go to bed peacefully knowing that his daughter is protected by two males- yeah two, Edward does not count- and one of those males happen to look like a monster that can instill fear into any man's heart.

After all the hugging and wiping of tears, our parents finally relent and decide to leave us to decorate our rooms. Lots of threats were made, and promises of protection and holding each other like brothers and sisters were reaffirmed before they all waved at us with teary eyes and evacuated our new space. We all retreated to our rooms to unpacking our stuff and by the time we all came out of our room it was seven at night, and everyone is way too tired to even think about making dinner, so we ordered some pizza.

When the pizza arrived, Emmett called us all out of our rooms into the living room and declared that instead of watching a movie, we play a game to get to know each other more.

"The rules are simple' started Emmett 'We each ask the person next to us a question, they answer the question and ask the person next to them another question or the question they just answered. You must answer the question or tell us one of your deepest darkest secrets. Simple isn't it?'

Before anyone could answer, Emmett on whether we want to play the game or not, he turned to Rose -sitting next to him- and asked her whether her boobs were real or fake. And just like that, we all turned to her to hear her response and unknowingly mutually agreed to play Emmett's game. We will all eventually take an oath to keep this night a secret between us and make it a night we never talk about.

 **Hey lovelies, long time no see! Sorry for my lack of update!**

 **Thank you to my beta because amazingness does not describe her, however, it's pretty close.**


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